PEACEMAKING 101

As we begin the New Year, I know with certainty that we will each face conflicts in the year ahead. There is much we must learn if we are to bring God glory through these conflicts. So, for the next three weeks we will seek to understand how to handle conflicts as God intends. Any church that ignores these things can have the appearance that they are alive, but in reality be dead. Oh, that God would make us alive in Him! We begin with ...

A) Let’s begin here by defining conflict. Conflict is a difference in opinion or purpose that frustrates someone’s goals or desires. At the heart of a conflict is someone not getting what they wanted. Conflict is possible because we live in a fallen world of sin cf. Romans 3:10; James 4:1-3. But, does all conflict have to be viewed as bad? No, the Bible does not teach that all conflict is bad; instead, it teaches that some differences are natural and beneficial (Ephesians 4:1-13). But, not all conflict is neutral or beneficial. The Bible teaches that many disagreements are the direct result of sinful motives and behavior cf. James 4:1-3. But, most importantly, the Bible teaches that we should see conflict neither as an inconvenience nor as an occasion for selfish gain, but rather as an opportunity to demonstrate the presence and power of God. Now, let’s turn our attention to the causes of conflicts.

B) Conflicts are caused by misunderstandings (Acts 15:22-29), differences in values, goals, gifts, priorities, expectations, or opinions (1 Corinthians 12:12-31), and sinful attitudes and desires that lead to sinful words and actions (James 4:1-3). Next, let’s consider some general categories of responses to conflict–some bad and some good. The first category is escape responses which include denial, flight, or suicide. The second is attack responses which include litigation, assault, or murder. The third is conciliation responses, or we could say the proper God-honoring responses which include overlooking an offense, restoration, negotiation, mediation, arbitration, or church discipline. We now come to consider conflict from God’s perspective.

A) Conflict provides us with three God-given and God-honoring opportunities. First, the opportunity to glorify God, or to show others who He is and what He is like. God is glorified when His people (those saved by faith in Christ) depend on and trust Him, and obey His commands even when it seems to put them at a disadvantage cf. Psalm 37:5-6; Luke 6:27-28. Here are two key questions to keep in mind at this point: "How can I please and honor the Lord in this situation? How can I show what Christ has done for me?" I think how we respond to conflicts would change, if we kept these two questions at the forefront of our minds when we face a conflict. Here’s another way of saying this: Jesus’ reputation depends on our striving earnestly for peace and unity cf. John 17:20-23. The second opportunity provided by conflict is the opportunity to serve others. This means helping to carry their burdens cf. Galatians 6:2,10. It also means to help others change through constructive confrontation cf. Galatians 6:1. And, it means teaching and encouraging others by example cf. Titus 2:7. The third opportunity provided by conflict is the opportunity for us to grow to be like Christ cf. Romans 8:28-29. Conflict helps us to remember our need for God’s grace cf. 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. Conflict helps to uncover sinful attitudes and habits cf. Psalm 119:67,71. Martin Luther said, "I never knew the meaning of God’s Word until I was afflicted." Conflict also provides opportunities to practice Godly habits. What better way to learn about forgiveness than to experience it or to grant it. We have much to learn about dealing with conflict! But, we should keep in mind that God is at work in each conflict bringing to pass His sovereign will. So, we should learn to view conflict not as an accident, but as a divine assignment. Therefore, we must be faithful and obedient in the midst of all conflicts that come our way. May God enable us to bring Him glory in the midst of each conflict!